Home Life & Context Works Family Tree S.T.A.S. Postcards Contact Book menu
The Selman-Troytt Commemoration
Baron Friedrich Von Tollamachen-Tollamach
The Baron

During the years 1890-1914, Europe produced only one serious opponent to the Selman-Troytt family's surging commercial development: Baron Friedrich Von Tollamachen-Tollamach, the ruthless Bavarian industrialist. Being German, his pride was exceeded only by his reputation for extreme cruelty. "I am sure that nobody can as cruel as me be", he boasted in an interview with The Times during the Leipzig Wurst Dispute, of which he was the instigator and principal beneficiary.

From his power base close to Neuschwanstein, the castellated folly of 'Mad' King Ludwig, the Baron launched more than a score of offensives against Jonah, Jonas and John, each more vicious and desperate than the last. They replied with only one.

In 1913 they exploited simmering tensions in the Balkans by encouraging Serbian nationalists to overthrow their Austro-Hungarian oppressors. "If things go according to plan," chortled Jonas, "we'll be glazing from Amiens to Sarajevo." The later assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand was to plunge Europe, and then the world, into the dark abyss of war for four grueling and window-shattering years.

Even the Baron was aghast at their audacity: "I am sure that these cold Englishmen no hearts have. They give even their souls for putty, nein?"

"He was a thorn in our flesh," Josiah later remarked. "We were glad when war broke out so that we had an excuse to shoot him legitimately."

Details of next stage of Selman-Troytt foreign expansion.
Special Note for Web Historians
The Selman-Troytt Postcard Emporium is the oldest purveyor of E-cards on the Internet. A copy of our first Royal Warrant may be examined here. Since the granting of this illustrious award we have been patronised by aristocrats, many of whom insist upon using Selman-Troytt cards to express the depth and sincerity of their affections. Indeed many of our cards - particularly those concerned with incest and paedophilia - have been inspired by a close examination of the aristocracy.

Info on Dave McIntyre or Saj Bashir?

Page generated in 0.0073 seconds.